Confessions from 5 women who’ve dated men in finance

Vanko described a different romantic encounter with a guy she met up with more than once who worked in private equity.

He was open about his reluctance to commit due to work and travel. At one point, she asked him if he was seeing anyone else. She said he responded frankly: “I have a London girl. You’re my American girl, and I have a girl in Berlin.”

One of Vanko’s longest entanglements was with a vice president at Goldman Sachs, whom she met on a dating app in 2023. Their first date was at a wine bar. From the cable-knit sweater he’d thrown on to the Rolex watch poking out from beneath his sleeve, Vanko clocked him as a “finance bro” instantly.

After a few more dates, she went on vacation to Los Angeles and returned to find he was dating someone else. Vanko said he slid back into her DMs when that relationship ended, complaining about his inability to find a partner and settle down.

Reflecting on his attitude, Vanko said, “I’m not your therapist. I’m happy to be your friend. But it got to the point that I was just like, ‘You’re complaining about this other girl. Weren’t you trying to date me?'”

Couples need trust to feel comfortable with the long workdays

A 24-year-old based in Chicago said her fiancé, a financial analyst for the auto industry, is proof that not all men in finance are cut from the same cloth.

“He’s an extremely humble person, and he just has the biggest heart,” said the Chicago resident, who works in PR and communications. Because they’ve been a couple for eight years, she said, she knew him before his “excruciating work hours.”

If she didn’t know him so well, she said, she might feel “anxiety” about the lack of communication and access to his phone he typically has during long days on the job.

She said she understands why people trying to pursue relationships with men in finance might wonder: “Does this guy even like me? He’s not responding to me. He doesn’t want to hang out with me.”

She said they’ve had to have “hard conversations” and set “boundaries” to ensure they prioritize each other despite their demanding careers.

Big date nights happen a handful of times a month — and always on weekends — but they try to have dinner together during the week without phones or laptops present, she said.

I asked her about the Journal’s claim of a “finance bro” summer.

“What finance bro is actually having a finance bro summer?” she asked. “They don’t really get a lot of time off.”

Some seem obsessed with playing golf and making money

In the summer of 2023, a woman interning at a private investment management firm in Boston met a senior investment consultant on a dating app. The woman, who asked to be referred to by her middle name, Summer, is now 23 and based in Washington DC.

On paper, he fit her type — older, good-looking, and ambitious. They went on to date most of that summer.

According to Summer, he was “obsessed” with two things: golf and money. These interests were obvious from how often he brought them up in conversation and also from the miniature golf set in the apartment he repeatedly told her cost him $4,000 a month in rent.

Williams said they’ve been conscious about planning to spend time together thanks to the distance between their cities and their busy work schedules.

But she’s noticed that a benefit of his career is how well he manages his personal finances.

“This is my first relationship where I have had a man to come to me like, ‘I am ready for you,'” she said.

Williams and Morrow plan to move in together in Charlotte in September. While she enjoys his financial savvy, she said his job didn’t make a huge difference.

“I could have cared less,” she said. “I just wanted to make sure that he was a good human.”