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But, Morley added, extravagant gifts can sometimes also be an attempt to manipulate the receiver or elicit a specific reaction from them.
“Some people use those gifts to repair after bad behavior or even abusive behavior, which I’m not saying the statue is, but that’s always something you’ve got to be aware of,” she added.
For people on the receiving end of a big present, Morley encourages exploring some key questions: Is it for an anniversary? Is there an expectation about how they should react?
“Was this, ‘I did something wrong, I’m going to make up for it by giving you something shiny to make you forget about it?'” she added.
In Zuckerberg’s case, Morley said the biggest red flag would be “if he commissioned this and spent God knows how much money and expected a certain reaction or response.”
Sharing such a lavish gift on social media is another potential warning sign
Some people in relationships can be quick to post and praise their spouses online, Morley said.
Zuckerberg posted a photo of the statue to Instagram, where he has 14.5 million followers — sharing the gift with a wide audience.
Morley wonders why.
“Was it really just to show his deep love and gratitude for her and who she is, and who she’s been in his life?” Morley said. “Or was it to make him look good to other people and to get a certain affectionate response from her.”
Morley said she’s particularly mindful of couples who feel “the need to show that kind of affection publicly” on highly curated social media platforms. She cited some research she’s read that suggests such displays could indicate the couples are less happy in real life.
“Was this a huge statue because Mark really wanted a huge statue? Or was this because Priscilla was like, ‘You know what? I love art. I would love a gigantic piece inspired by Roman architecture,” Morley said.
As to whether the gift is sweet or cringey, the only person whose opinion matters is Chan, Morley said.
It seems like the statue has gotten Chan’s seal of approval.
She commented on Zuckerberg’s post, “The more of me the better?” with a red heart emoji, to which her husband responded, “Always” with another red heart emoji.
“If she thinks it’s sweet, it’s sweet,” Morley said.